Mental Health

ADD

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So my 1st assignment is talking about my different mental conditions, talking about how they affect me, how I live with them, and if I think I can do anything different to deal with them
1st one is what I think is the easiest to deal with. ADD, or attention deficit disorder. Its very common today, and I mean very common. Technically ADHD is the most common but the two are technically the same. I also don’t have a huge hyperactivity problem, so while my doctor says ADHD because that’s the new go-to, I say ADD because I know the H is not very true for me.
I say this one is not my biggest concern because although it is a problem, I feel as though all my other issues far overshadow this one. A doctor said I have it, but hardly any professional or myself focus on it. I guess the other conditions I have are more, concerning. It still has negative affects on me. My attention span is in fact short. My ability to focus on one thing is very low. I am often thinking about many things at once. I get distracted so easily by the smallest things. That joke when someone is saying something and then sees a squirrel and they lose all focus? I am like that a lot. My conversations with people can go in such weird directions because I can literally forget the topic of talk in an instant. Classes and school and work are also pretty difficult. Focusing on one subject or one chore is a huge challenge. This does make me very good at multitasking fortunately. Mainly at work. Multitasking school stuff is a different story.
I can easily stare at a wall and daydream. My imagination is also wild, and I have ADD in my fantasy world’s too. When I get bored, my mind is instantly gone. My daydream is usually fanfiction stories or some original adventure with some original character. Sometimes my daydreams will give me a picture to try and replicate in my sketchbook. The positive thing about this is that I can have some pretty vivid daydreams and can write or type them down in good detail pretty soon after. I can also draw whatever art I pictured. The thing that frustrates me is if I am in a situation where I can’t get to my computer or sketchbook because I am busy (Class, work, somewhere professional, not home) I will eventually regain my focus, but with this I lose my images and story details. I know there’s some epic adventures I have forgotten 100%. There some pictures I had that I will probably not see again. When you have a great idea and lose it in a couple hours, that can be stubborn.
I have to be careful not to completely confuse ADD with GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder). They are two very different things but the symptoms overlap a lot. My mind is often plagued with racing thoughts of everything I ever have to do. That is a symptom of both ADD and GAD. Imagine you have a planner on your phone with every assignment, project, class and work schedule, exam, quiz, and important event listed on it. You know how you can set alarms to remind yourself of certain things? Now, imagine an alarm for every single listed item in a two week period goes off at once with the alarm volume on full blast and you can’t get every alarm off. That’s what my mind is like occasionally. This is mainly associated with GAD and I will use this scenario again when I start my next blog on that but this does belong on this post too. Since I have difficulty focusing on one thing, my mind starts multitasking on its own. If I am in my history class and I start thinking about my math homework, that is a big distraction and it’s hard for me to return my focus to the class I am already in. That alarm issue only happens rarely and is a result , but normally I am thinking about like 4-5 things at once. Focusing on one thing is so difficult, I don’t understand how people do it. Like right now every final I have is on my mind along with trying to figure out how I’m moving all my stuff out of my dorm. Thinking about everything gives me such a headache.
I’ve been advised to try a med that helps with attention, but part of me is paranoid that the medicine will somehow screw me up even more, the other half of me knows that I’m taking several other mental medications already and I’m allergic to medicines with certain ingredients so I don’t feel like getting more prick tests to find out if I’m ok for a new addition to the med list.
So now I am supposed to think of how I currently fight this and could improve myself. I could try meds, but like previously mentioned I don’t want to. It took me 5 years to get over my fear of antidepressant side effects. I should have been on antidepressants long ago yet I refused to because of paranoia. I am honestly just untrusting of meds in general. Honestly I don’t even know how I cope with this now. I just kinda think about whatever. If it get to dangerous anxiety level that is again another story. But with the simple ADD, well, I really just let it win. I zone out and lose focus so often, but I am decently good at realising I need to be doing something and returning to reality. The only times I have issues in when I am super bored. But, yea, I really just tell myself to stop and I do, for a short time at least. Can I do anything more than that that’s not meds? Well I really don’t know. Do I want to? I mean not having 20 thoughts at once would be nice, but this issue is only a minor hiccup compared to the others.

{Originally Posted from 1st blog: May 8th, 2017; Contained 3 Thoughts:

“I could not more relate to this blog. My attention span and lack of focus has really had a poor result on my school work over the past few years. My parents refuse to believe I have an attention problem, because “everyone has those nowadays…” which drives me crazy”-.zrm895

“I have not ever gone to a doctor to be diagnosed with ADD, but it sure as hell seems like I have it at least a little. I find myself having the attention span of a squirrel and never ever being able to pay attention, it is actually bad. Also, it is genetic and my father has it, so thats another possibility. We learned about GAD in my psychology class as well. I am glad that you now have it under control.”-ellllbo

“It is wonderful that you can recognize your diagnosis as a strength and weakness. I believe it makes you stronger as a person to battle without medication. I can agree, I would feel some type of way about meds also, I don’t trust doctors or medication at all. I believe in natural healing unless it’s under drastic circumstances. I do applaud you for moving past ADD and making it here to college and furthering your education. Keep doing great things.”-destanynene

Post is copy pasted, left untouched in the transference between blogs}

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